Her Marriage Counselor Said She Was The Problem When She And Her Husband Went To Therapy

When TikToker Hadley (@nursehadley) and her husband went to therapy, the marriage counselor said that she was the problem, and she believed him. They were in therapy because her husband had discovered her secret bank account.

But here's why she had a secret bank account in the first place. When Hadley was pregnant with her oldest daughter, she had a consultation with a divorce lawyer.

The lawyer told her that in Mississippi, women can't file for divorce while pregnant, but advised her to open a bank account that her husband couldn't access.

"He was going through my purse one day, and he found the debit card that the bank had given me," said Hadley. "At that point, I had only been able to save $50 in the account. He freaked out, so we go to therapy, and I was actually thinking to myself that it was going to be a good thing."

However, the therapist they saw was someone that her husband had been going to on and off for years. That therapist never asked her why she had the account or if there was any abuse going on in the marriage.

He simply stated that she could not have a secret bank account because it was basically equivalent to cheating on someone. Hadley didn't know what to believe and started doubting herself.

She explained to the therapist that she had already closed the account and transferred the $50 to the joint account. The $50 was just some cash she had used to open the account, as well as from her small earnings as a content creator. She was only making about $11 a month from her videos.

The therapist declared that they needed to start rebuilding trust and told Hadley that she needed to give her husband any cash she ended up acquiring.

"He made me sit there in his office and log onto every single one of my social media accounts in front of them and switch the PayPal email from my name to my husband's email," recalled Hadley.

bedya - stock.adobe.com - illustrative purposes only, not the actual people - pictured above a couple dressed in sweaters holds hands

"We stayed married for four more years. I had another child with him, and the social media accounts grew to a lot more than $11 a month."

She thought her earnings were going into their joint savings account, but it turned out that her husband was gambling it all away. More than $200,000 to $300,000 had just completely disappeared.

Eventually, Hadley was able to divorce him, no thanks to that so-called marriage counselor.

Many TikTok users took to the comments section to express their opinions on the situation. They agreed that the therapist didn't seem to be very ethical.

"Having a secret account is not cheating, especially when it is for your safety. I don't see it as cheating regardless, but that person should not be a therapist," commented one user.

"[A] similar thing happened to me. He opened the mail and found out about my bank account and went absolutely off the rails. Except our marriage counselor, a woman, clocked him from day one. Anyway, he died a few months later, so it's all good," shared another.

"The therapist literally handed him the keys to financially abuse you, which is one of the biggest red flags of domestic violence and coercive control in relationships," wrote a third.

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